False Alarm

Some people just don’t think before speaking. The other morning neither hot espresso nor an iced cold shower could keep me or several of my classmates awake. I have polled many CEGEP students and it is a common consensus that 8 a.m. classes are incredibly hard to get up for never mind staying awake in.  But, on what felt like the coldest day of the year so far, were we ever in for a rude awakening!

I sat in the biology lab, droopy eyed, as the lab technician explained the procedure for the day’s experiment. Thirty-two students were present, dressed in long white lab coats and huge, unattractive lab goggles.  Alex, the lab technician, explained the test that we were to conduct during the experiment - which to this day, I cannot remember.   Sorry Alex!  Mid-sentence, she was rudely interrupted by the fire alarm.

The piercing noise echoed through the halls and into the classrooms.  Fatigued students raised their heads in disbelief. “There is NO way I am going outside!” I blurted to my lab partner. “This is insane.”   As the teacher and the lab technician guided us outdoors we all asked if this was a joke.  Irritated, we all shuffled our way across the lab, down the hall and into the cold, frigid air.  “Am I dreaming,” commented one student who looked like he could have just woken up.

The cold air on a winter’s day made shivers run down our spines as our shoes made crunching noises on the compacted snow. We huddled like penguins to keep warm; but, what the intelligent Marianopolis students did not realise was that at -25 degree temperatures, everything is cold!  It was worth the try; so, we stood, huddled in a circle hoping to absorb the body heat emitted from our friends.   After two minutes, the biting cold became unbearable and it seemed like the irritated students turned into ferocious monsters!


We were informed that by law we must all stand nine meters away from the building when the fire alarm sounds. As if asking us to go outside almost naked wasn’t enough torture! So the monster-like penguins marched to the College’s courtyard and reassumed their huddle position just like pro-football players! Most of my class stood together joking about our sexy and   seductive, we actually meant nerdy, lab coats.  We felt like we were the coolest students there, but one student sporting a Louis Vuitton purse and a Blackberry in one hand and a medium-sized latté in the other, did not.  I won’t mention the color of her hair for fear of being accused of stereotyping, but I think there was a picture of Paris Hilton on her screensaver.  Not being able to button her lip she rudely offered her opinion to a friend of hers in an annoying, nasal voice.    “You know, it’s probably one of those F***’en science students who probably blew something up in the chem lab; and now, we all have to stand outside and suffer.” 

With a nauseating look on her face, she examined her entourage only to find science students, in sexy, white lab coats standing beside her!  Repulsed, we had no shame in staring her down.  “OH MY GOSH, I’M SOOO SORRY,” she blurted out, “I DID NOT SEE YOU THERE!” As if that would change anything!  Embarrassed, she paced up the driveway until she was out of sight.  As for the science students in their sexy, white lab coats….well, we toughed out the cold for several more minutes and then were allowed back into our lab for the next session of our REM cycles!